My Diary:

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My Diary

The diary begins with the introduction followed by the opening 11/17 demonstration, excluding the Narodni Trida massacre. I recorded its description from one and another friend of mine. Especially strong is a description provided by two other friends.

I was sorting out things on 11/18.

Everything became more intense on Sunday 11/19, when the rumor about a death of a student was spread. Another demonstration took place in Prague; I recorded a short description of it from one of my classmates.

The last entry describes the start and the first day of strike on my high-school on Monday, 11/20, and a demonstration that took place in the evening of that day. Relating to is our official strike statement of my high-school mates in the Resources section.

This English translation is almost word-by-word authentic and unedited, with all that pros and cons it has.
Please note that a couple of parts of the text are quite graphic and probably not the best thing for small children.

Introduction

I don’t keep a regular diary. I just felt such a strong pressure to record my experience and feelings during the revolution that I was putting the first four days of it on paper. Later, the events started to be so hectic and I was so tired that I had to stop (I found out that you have to sleep even during revolutions!) So if you want to know "how it ended up" and "who won", so to speak, check out either the Kraft Book diary or the American newspaper articles from that time, all here, for the description of the days that immediately followed.

At the time of the revolution, I was a student of one of Prague's "Gymnasiums", semi-elite high schools for future university students. My parents were anti-communists living the apathetic gray life of the normalization after a few attempts to escape it, both physically and socially. Like so many of Czechs of their generation, they resigned to any resistance and found the only free world in the family life. They were truly a beaten generation... Our family was quite ordinary and I was a pretty ordinary student, too. I lived a schizoid life, like the majority of people (that is, those who didn't have the courage to fight back openly). So I participated reluctantly in the Socialist Youth Union like most of my classmates and I was going to anti-regime demonstrations from time to time like... well, many of my friends. That was the only way to be a "whole", not thinking one thing and doing another -- and it was extremely exciting or even "cool" for us teenagers, anyway. I was also reading some circulating illegal literature and was attending half-illegal underground concerts, but I was no hero and I tried not to get hurt when the police started their job when I happened to be around. I was never arrested during the demonstrations...

In November 1989, I participated in all the major popular events, but I was an "ordinary revolutionaire" being quite far from the very center of the happenings. Still, looking back at these pages, I recognize how extraordinary this whole time was. And how it completely shaped both what became possible for me as well as who I am now.

And just a little perspective-setting note to a reader who might not have been exposed to much of the communist bloc reality: these demonstrations were illegal. But the punishment wasn't just a fee or a day behind the bars, like it's these days. If you got caught, you might have been beaten, arrested for days without any trial, and afterwards you might have been deprived of your possibility to study - high school and higher, to work in any but the worst of jobs, to travel out of the country, even to walk free. Not just you, but your entire family could face that fate; all that was needed was just one small mistake on your part. So any anti-government activity was a high-risk business and something you wouldn't dare to even talk about to all but close friends; so ordinary people were very scared and very obedient. Perhaps more than in the rest of the communist bloc. The sudden raise of personal and national courage during the 11/17 and afterwards was totally unexpected... and totally euphoric. If only we were able to keep it.

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